Liberty and Oppression

[Mr. Futsu]

Every time I try to leave for Lady Violet's house, another document is thrown on my desk. Piles and piles of endless paperwork, until finally, I finish enough of it to finally set aside the rest for the morning.

I get up to leave, and my secretary stops me.

"Don't forget to-"

I nod as though I am listening intently for a few sentences, then cut her off when I realize that I hadn't heard a word she had said.

"Tell me tommorow. I am going out for the evening. Goodnight." I say, not remembering her name.

I leave the ministry before she can say anything else, and take a teleportation booth to Violet's house, knowing she'll be upset with me. My office could burn down, my car could have been attacked by terrorists, or the entire Ministry of Information could have fallen through the planet with me still inside of it, and she would be equally upset with such tardiness.

I knock on her door.

[Lady Violet]

I just about attack Futsu when he knocks at the door.
"You're late, but since this is after hours, I won't hold it against you."
I fold my arms over my chest and turn to lead him into my house. I am sure he can tell that I am not in the best of moods. I ought to be kinder, I am starting to act like Lin-Sat.
"Sorry Mr. Futsu, I don't know what I would do without you. I have been under so much stress. Something must be done about the LIF. Noe came poking around for answers about Little Sister. These enemies of ours should be humbled. Noe should be humbled."
I take a seat and twist my legs together anxiously.

"I am a foolish woman, but he really is quite interesting. Too bad we can not convince him to leave the LIF."

[Mr. Futsu]

She's in one of her moods again. Although I can't blame her.

"This troubles me that he's trying to find out about the little sister project. As interesting as he may be, you need to sever all contact with him. For the good of yourself, and the party." I say, wondering why she always goes for the difficult ones.

[Lady Violet]

I sprawl out on the sofa and let out a heavy sigh. I toss my chin length bobbed hair with my hand and bite my thumbnail as I speak.
"It's all so frustrating. You know Mr. Futsu, I have come to the conclusion that I am incapable of loving a man. They are just tools to be used for recreation. They have some political use as well. I think that you over estimate the reprecussions of my little affair with Noe. It may actually be useful if executed properly. I'm sure than both organizations could gain. But, we will not think of that. I will heed your advice for now and ponder the politics later."

I sit up and glance around my home, trying to see if anything is out of place.

"I didn't invite you here for your advice."

[Mr. Futsu]

I open my mouth to speak, but what I was going to say was something to the effect of 'a gain for any other organization other than our own is a loss for Red Infinity', she however didn't invite me over for my advice, so I decide to change my tune.

"Shall we?"

[Lady Violet]

"No, I would rather sit in my living room and have you secretly lambast me for my decisions." I can read his mind and know what he was thinking. And yes, he is right, any gain for LIF is a loss for us.

I frown and lead him to my bedroom. I am angry and hopefully this wormish man can help to ease that.

"Tell me, have you ever loved anyone, or do you just work and try to forget yourself in people. Why do you do what you do? Because I order you to?"

[Mr. Futsu]

Doing your job is much more difficult when the person you're trying to lie to can read your mind. I curse myself for not 'watching' my thoughts better.

"I am not very introspective Violet, nor do I really like to talk about myself. But if you must know, I do what I do because if I don't stay busy, I begin to get introspective."

I cross my arms, and think of Victoria.

"I don't know what my opinion is about love, but if it truly is what I think it is, then love is overrated." I say in a somewhat Machiavellian fashion.

[Lady Violet]

I sit on my bed and feel no comfort in his words.
But what did I expect? He is not a complex man. He would sleep with Lin Sat if he thought he could get more power in the party.
I should think more highly of him. He is my PR man and very loyal to me and the party. Also, I have also enjoyed sex with him in the past.

That must give him some worth than just a capitalistic worm.

"Oh, nevermind. We each have our own lives and sufferings to figure out on our own. No sense sharing with others. It was silly of me to even bring it up. I just wanted you to say or do something to impress me. Something unexpected."

[Mr. Futsu]

I don't like being treated like a pet, or a worm, which is what inevitably happens to me when I spend time with Violet.

"I know your opinion of me Violet, and I can't stop you from having your own opinions. But I'll have you know that I am usually very good at impressing others, but that skill diminishes drastically when the other person has the ability to read my mind. It's hard to hold a poker face when you keep peeking over my shoulder at my hand." I say, trying to explain where I'm coming from.

"I am here because your power frightens, and excites me. I like being stripped of my power, and having someone else making all the decisions for me at times."

I sit up, and rest my hands on my lap.

"You misunderstand my intentions. They are masochistic, and not selfish."

[Lady Violet]

"You WANT to be abused by me?" I say, paying special emphasis on want. "You want to be abused?" I repeat again more to myself than to him. I lay down on my stomach and look up at him. I ponder it for a moment.

"You want to be abused...." That is unexpected. I look at him differently. Maybe there is some humanity in him which he manages to stiffle with other pains.

"I am your injury?"

I am baffled by all of this.

"Sit down by me."

[Mr. Futsu]

I get up, and sit beside Lady Violet.

"You aren't an injury, rather a syringe. Ever since I have been young, I have always been seeking to dirty my own name, but have never been able to bring myself to do it. This is something I can do on a smaller level."

I turn to face her.

"I like being used, Violet. And that is why I am openly cheating on a woman who cares so much about me. I know she would never do that to me, and I hate it. I hate her loyalty, her love for me, the structure we have in our relationship. I want her to hate me too."

Words pour out of my mouth like a dam that has just sprung a minor leak, and eventually collapses, the wrath of an entire river following behind it. Why am I sharing all of this with her?

[Lady Violet]

It is hard to think of your own troubles in the presense of another troubled soul. I listen to what he has to say with genuine empathy.
When he is done, I pull him near to me, and embrace him. I put his head to my chest and tell him I am sorry. I don't think there is more for me to do. I feel guilt for having used him, even if that is what he wants.

I sit there with him close, it is not a romantic closeness but a nurturing closeness. I hold his head and touch his hair.

"You should get some rest. We both must get up early. Stay with me, but I can't...do with you what I intended..."

[Mr. Futsu]

I begin to feel a little strange, a twinge of guilt perhaps, about sharing how I feel. And boy did it backfire.

"Ah hell... Maybe you're right... Alright, I'll stay here..." I say, somewhat disappointed. But I can't blame her for not wanting to go through with it after what she just heard from me. Who wants to be called a syringe?

I enjoy her embrace, and could easilly fall asleep like this.

[Lady Violet]

I lay him down beside me, but realize that we are both still in our work clothes. I am not in the mood to get undressed with him. My emotions are very mixed. I feel for him some genuine emotions...mostly compassion and maybe some pity. I feel like undressing him would be like playing with a broken toy. I would rather just....leave him alone or...a better solution, try to put him back together.

"You know what, you can have my room and bed, I will stay in a guest room."

I smile faintly and get out of bed. I tuck him in and kiss his forehead as though he is a little boy.
I leave quickly and enter the guest room. There, I feel comfortable to undress and go to bed.

[Mr. Futsu]

I curl up in Lady Violet's bed, and kick off my clothes underneath the covers. I feel slightly insulted by her behaviors, but know she means well. I knew she wouldn't understand...

I'll worry about that in the morning. I drift off into unconsciousness.