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Post by Matsumura on Sept 26, 2004 17:57:36 GMT -5
Oh, me and Zinn go way back as far as not seeing eye to eye. And so, there is only one thing left for me to say to you, Zinn. This has been a long time coming, so don't be so surprised: "Will you marry me?"
So, I hear some mods are leaving. That sucks. I liked Grove and Peter.
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Post by Raz Nili Ze'ev on Sept 26, 2004 18:03:49 GMT -5
Peter's leaving too? I thought it was just Grove...
I can't believe they're leaving over John. That totally sucks.
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Post by Grove on Sept 26, 2004 18:11:30 GMT -5
I do apologize that I am leaving. I was not able to post it where more people could see. I just did it in the main thread. My reasons are mixed, partially over my personal experiences were with John, and partially because of his disrespect to anyone and everyone on this site if they ask him to change. He did it to me in the past. When I see him do it to others, it makes me sick. I had hoped that he would leave so others would not have to go through the same thing I did, but that does not look like it will happen. If I cant help others, I might as well be greedy I guess, and just not deal with him anymore. That is why I am choosing to leave. Today is my last day.
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Post by Raz Nili Ze'ev on Sept 26, 2004 18:24:15 GMT -5
You could just ignore him and avoid him.
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Post by Valodya Bassarov on Sept 26, 2004 18:27:08 GMT -5
No everyone wanted him to be banned. There was a significant voice which wanted to keep him here
I really dont think that quiting the rpg helps the situation
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Post by Raz Nili Ze'ev on Sept 26, 2004 18:29:49 GMT -5
I think the number of good RPGers on this site outnumber the bad. I also think leaving is a bit drastic.
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Post by Matsumura on Sept 26, 2004 18:34:18 GMT -5
Yeah, I agree with that.
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Post by Grove on Sept 26, 2004 18:54:55 GMT -5
But it does help the situation on both ends. Consider this.
If I leave:
1) John will have one less person to go off on because of personal connections.
2) I will not have to deal with John in any way anymore, effectively removing him from what I have to deal with.
I was one that wanted him banned, because that way I would not have to deal with him anymore, or his insults. If he is not going to leave, I know he will stay the same even if he is warned time and time again. The only solution? I leave.
What happens if a person you love (this RPG) had some really bad flaws that you could not live with anymore (John), and no matter how nicely or stearly you asked them to stop they would not. And lets say one of the things this person does is psychological damage in the form of personal insults. What options do this person have? They have tried asking them to change. They have tried seeking help from others. They have tried ignoring it but find they can't. What is left? You leave them to resume a better life somewhere else.
I hope this analogy explains my thought processes better to some.
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Post by Valodya Bassarov on Sept 26, 2004 19:05:18 GMT -5
Well I think you should give things time and see the outcome of things
People discussed it, and not enough were for banning to ban him.
Banning him at this point would be unfair
We then must try a new approach and see how that works
If it fails, then maybe banning is an option in the future
But, I think a person has to be patient and try other options first. You can not say they will fail when they have not yet
That may be your experience in the past, but it does not mean that things will always be so.
People react differently depending on those who deal with them
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Post by Grove on Sept 26, 2004 19:06:09 GMT -5
I would like to say that I am good enough to be able to ignore him and his actions, but find I can't, even it it has nothing to do with my characters. He has insulted me so much in the past, and it did hurt, especially since it was not called for. Now I see him doing the same thing to other people. It is hard to not notice the huge OOC wars that happen with him. Seeing it happen to other people makes me sick, and brings back rather bad memories of what he did on my own site.
It is true what you say Bass. People do react differently depending on who they are dealing with. If you can get him under control, you will not only have me back at this site, but will have gained an immesurable amount of respect from me personally, and that is in addition to the already large amount I have for you.
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Post by Valodya Bassarov on Sept 26, 2004 19:08:27 GMT -5
Well what if we had him write an appology to those whose feelings he has hurt?
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Post by Jareth on Sept 26, 2004 19:09:29 GMT -5
Bass he has apologized to me many times before...but he never changed. And he always did it again...and apologized for it...isn't that right john...lol. Its not really all john tho...its just how it was handled as well...john was just the straw to break my back so it seems.
The ones leaving thus far are not the only ones leaving. I am going as well. I can not tolerate what is going on here and well...as much as it hurts me to say it...i too will be leaving soon. I have enough stress in my life without having to walk on eggshells. I did this for fun. And i wish it still was. But its not.
Grove put it best in the post above. That is why i must go. I am sorry. But this is how i feel.
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Post by Grove on Sept 26, 2004 19:10:08 GMT -5
Hah... Try and get him to do that. I doubt he will. He would say something along the lines of 'I have no reason to apologize to him (or them)'. Jareth tried asking him to do the same thing when it came to me in the past, and she was his friend. He refused, saying the same thing i said above.
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Post by Valodya Bassarov on Sept 26, 2004 19:12:47 GMT -5
I think this isnt fair to me
In the end, John likely wont care what happens if you leave, or you wont care if he leaves
But don't my own feelings mean anything?
I have to stand in the centre of things and be as fair as I can
I am also expected not to get angry or be personally against people.
I think if you leave it would accomplish nothing more, than causing me grief
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Post by Grove on Sept 26, 2004 19:22:43 GMT -5
I am sorry you are in the middle of this, but at times that is what happens when you are the one in charge, especially of something that deals with so many people. I am sure you realized this when you made this board. I am not trying to make it hard on you, nor am I trying to hurt your feelings in any way. If you want, go ahead and tell me how you feel about me doing this right here. I will be totally understanding because I know your feelings are well founded. Like I said though, this is my choice. I don't want to have to deal with this anymore, so I am choosing to leave, as are others who are fed up with his actions it seems. You need not feel guilty either, and I am sorry if you feel it is like having to choose between one member and another.
I have made up my mind though. Just like you have made up yours. You do not want to ban anyone. I respect that. I do not want to deal with John anymore. I hope you can respect that as well.
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